TALES FROM 2065

Episode Two – Bouncing Baby Boys (Part 2)

A series of stories about the experience of a young boy in the University of Ghana. The stories are mostly true with some fictionalized parts for the benefit of the story.

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Episode Two – Bouncing Baby Boys (Part 2)

The next bouncing baby boy is Brian. Brian is a little shy with the ladies and always needs a massive push in order to make a move (if what he does can be called a move). There is much to say about Brian because he was always too afraid to make a move. Roland and Erik’s experiences have frightened him so much that he has refused to readily put himself out there for disappointment. That is not to say that he hasn’t been bounced. He has. Brian after several attempts by his closest friends to get him in a relationship, finally got very close to a beautiful maiden. The rest of the group praised him so much for overcoming the tempest of loneliness. I remember going to church that Sunday to thank God for blessing my friend with such a beautiful companion. Even Roland was threatening to steal her from Brian if he delayed in concluding the deal (the greedy idiot). 

Brian was bounced by this lady whose name is synonymous with victory. I guess the victory was over Brian. This nearly destroyed Brian. He later told us some BS about how his church would not allow a union like theirs. I mean, like really? Brian later found favor in the eyes of a beautiful lady with a perfect attitude. This was after the group had vigorously presented Brian in the best light possible to this lady. Her name was Nella. Mind you, this is the same Nella that bounced Roland in the past. Brian was too scared to make any move whatever. One bitten, twice shy right? A month or so passed and just when Brian had finally gathered all the courage to do anything, Nella became fed up and bounced him off. Welcome to the family bro.

Brian and Roland got tired of their inability to win the hearts of any lady on campus (which they called their ISSUES) so much that, they found love in the bottle. They had a saying: s3 ab3 baako b3 sei de3, anka kookoofuo enshie (for one palm tree to get spoilt, then the cocoa farm should rather burn). This is because the palm tree would be used for brewing palm wine. 

Master Kobla was the star of the bouncing baby boys. Every one of us looked up to him; because as much as he was bounced, he also won. Kobla was bounced by Lucy – a political science mate of his. She bounced him for a Deeper-Life dude with no game whatsoever. He also came up with the same BS excuse Brian gave. He was also bounced by another mate – Phoebe – who is now a talented make-up artist. And there was Beatrice too. She bounced him bad.

But Kobla was the boss. He had succeeded in in his bid to be a relationship with two ladies while we were on campus – Geneva and Deborah. He even turned down the affections of a beautiful lady, Robin. This is the same Robin that bounced Erik some time back. Kobla is the hero among us bouncing baby boys. Remember these names, you will surely meet them again.

Finally, there is me. The last bouncing baby boy. I have only been bounced once. Okay twice. Alright there is a third time but that one doesn’t count. That’s all. I was bounced by one annoying little princess who thinks she is all that. (rolls eyes repeatedly in their socket). Fuhmida bounced me so subtly it didn’t feel like a bounce at all. I was also bounced by a relative of a well-known writer who I think wasn’t ready for some ‘sugar’ at the time. “Felix, I have suffered!” 

Not to brag, but some of Kobla’s charms must have robbed off on me. I had succeeded in dating a beautiful lady while on campus. I had a girlfriend; and she wasn’t imaginary like the one Brian claimed to have had. And oh, I also turned down the affections of one Cecilia. I am more like Kobla than I thought. 

Despite our shortcomings and failures in getting accepted into a relationship, we hold our heads high and keep fighting till the right women welcomes us into their hearts. We will always be friends and be there to support each other. We are the BOUNCING BABY BOYS.

Author: Kofi Dzogbewu

Writing. Books. Poetry. Creativity

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